To the walking stranger (by Ronin-kun, watashi no oniichan, reproduced with permision)
we were just walking by, strangers in the dimming light. barely even saying hi, until our eyes then met.
we thought so little of that time, as if it were just luck. but then we met at later dates and realised we were stuck.
we chose to walk together then, and have so ever since. but as we approach the next stop, what remains to be seen?
you took the bus that came, and went on ahead of me. you had your own life to lead, and left me to defend mine.
we walked once together, along an empty road. just had to let you know...
that if ever on your journey you need someone to care just call, and i'll be there. ------------------------------------------------------
Thought I'd start off with the poem because, since I fought so hard for the right to reproduce it, I might as well post it up. And also... It descibes the mood I'm in now...
The 'you' in the poem... It could refer to so many people. I don't think I'll go through the list here for privacy's sake. In general, it can refer to many individuals in the CO. The people who 'walked' with me through SYF, through the COncert, till today. We braved the storm together, and emerged victorious. Sort of. The concert was a relative success. Thank you seniors for walking with me! Thank you Darice, Xiaohui, Powey, Lining, Mu Liang, Eileen, Kaiwen, Cheryl, See tho, Nic, Xuhua, Wee Keat, Colin, Jon, Jill, Timothy. Did I miss anyone out? I think I did, a lot... Bah, my brain isn't working tonight. Yea, anyway, thanks Eileen and Kaiwen for the postcards! So sweet of you two! =D Also thanks to the people quitting CO for accompanying me on this 'voyage into the realms of the dunno-what dunno-what' (ahem, explicit reference to the LAME emcee's script for the concert... lolx) For those remaining in CO, SO SAD!!! You have to endure my lameness for one more year... Mwahahahaha... =p
The poem could also refer to someone else. Someone who has made me regret coming to AC more and more. Perhaps if I hadn't come to AC, things would have been different. I would have forgotten you. I would have moved on. As it is, every night I ask God if I had done the right thing. When I made my decision last December, I asked myself this question every night. 8 months later, I find myself asking the same question. Perhaps things would have been more right if I had followed the yellow brick road set for me? I don't know! I'm a bad decision maker lah. Sometimes I wonder, do I trust God enough? Maybe not.
Bah... Don't know what to do le lah! Just let things happen lor... What has happened has happened. And what will happen, will happen. Right? In His time.
And so, the title for this blog entry, represents walking away from all I've held dear. Maybe it's time to do that... There are things that I thought I'd left behind, but they still reside at the back of my mind. Maybe it's time to really really put them down, and walk away, leave them behind...
Think there are a lot of other things I want to discuss. But here is not the place to discuss ba... Maybe, in time, all will be revealed... Heex... Till then, hope everything will be ok... I'm not the type who can stop worrying... Haha...